Jokes One day Mr. Smith, the president of a large corporation, called his vice-president, Dave, into his office and said, "We're making some cutbacks, so either Jack or Barbara will have to be laid off." Dave looked at Mr. Smith and said, "Barbara is my best worker, but Jack has a wife and three kids. I don't know whom to fire." The next morning Dave waited for his employees to arrive. Barbara was the first to come in, so Dave said, "Barbara, I've got a problem. You see, I've got to lay you or Jack off and I don't know what to do?" Barbara replied, "You'd better jack off. I've got a headache." A couple just got married and on the night of their honeymoon before passionate love, the wife tells the husband, "Please be gentile, I'm still a virgin." The husband being shocked, replied, "How's this possible? You've been married three times before." The wife responds, "Well, my first husband was a gynecologist and all he wanted to do was look at it. My second husband was a psychiatrist and all he wanted to do was talk about it. Finally, my third husband was a stamp collector and all he wanted to do was...oh, do I miss him!" A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. After about 15 minutes of it, the man finally gets up and says, "Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!". The woman says, "Me too, you've been eating grass for the past ten minutes!" A guy walks into a sperm donor bank wearing a ski mask and holding a gun. He goes up to the nurse and demands her to open the sperm bank vault. She says "But sir, its just a sperm bank!", "I don't care, open it now!!!" he replies. So she opens the door to the vault and inside are all the sperm samples. The guy says "Take one of those sperm samples and drink it!", she looks at him "BUT, they are sperm samples???" , "DO IT!". So the nurse sucks it back. "That one there, drink that one as well.", so the nurse drinks that one as well. Finally after 4 samples the man takes off his ski mask and says, "See honey - its not that hard." How are women and tornadoes alike? They both moan like hell when they come, and take the house when they leave. A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary. As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband, "When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?" The husband replied, "All I wanted to do was to fuck your brains out, and suck your tits dry." Then, as the wife undressed, she asked, "What are you thinking now?" He replied, "It looks like I did a pretty good job."
	More Jokes http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_august_2011.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_july_2011.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_june_2011.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_may_2011.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_april_2011.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_mar_2011.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_feb_2011.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_jan1.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_dec_1_2010.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_nov_2.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_nov1.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_oct1_2010.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_sept_2.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_sept1.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_aug1.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_august_2.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_july3.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jiokes_july2.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_july2.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_july1.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_june2.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes_may2010.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/jokes.html http://miamilifemagazine.com/id20.html